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In this episode of The Stories That Sparkle, I sit down with my good friend Mandy for the kind of chat we might have at brunch and talk about the many different symptoms of “The Change,” aka menopause, or, in her case, perimenopause. Along the way, we do take some significant detours, and reveal some major stuff to each other that we did not know before, and discover all the different ways we now know how to advocate for ourselves.
So, I invite you to get comfortable, sit back, and listen in.
Scroll down to connect with Mandy, find links about menopause, perimenopause & osteoporosis (and more), and read the beautiful and personal note Mandy wrote for all of you after we recorded this episode and for which she gave me permission to share and post.
Mandy Loy is a yoga teacher, personal trainer, and wellness advocate who blends modern movement science with ancient healing practices. With a special focus on yoga for the nervous system and bone health, Mandy supports women navigating perimenopause and helps clients build bone density safely and effectively through strength training, yoga, and holistic practices. She teaches group yoga classes at Valley Health Wellness Center and works privately with clients at Body Elite Wellness Center where she works directly with clients with osteoporosis and osteopenia. She also offers specialized workshops and private yoga sessions at Body Elite.
To connect with Mandy, find her on Instagram @mandyloyyoga or reach out to her via email at mandyloyyoga@gmail.com
LINKS TO RESOURCES
some suggestions for places to include as you start or expand your own inquiry. take what you like, add your own, and leave the rest.
THE (M) FACTOR – Shredding the Silence on Menopause (This documentary film (first aired on PBS in October 2024) is a great place to start for both some history to how we got here, where things stand now and where we want to go in helping women navigate menopause).
Strength Training Builds More Than Muscles
Mayo Clinic - Osteoporosis (Overview)
Society for Women's Health Research
What You Should Use To Treat Vaginal Dryness (This just one resource. Ask your doctor for more information including inserts such as VagiFem and YuvaFem that can help. Both of those require a prescription and either should be covered by most insurance prescription drug plans. Coverage and costs will vary depending on insurance and pharmacy so confirm with your doctor or pharmacist).
Perimenopause - Symptoms and causes - Mayo Clinic
Menopause Symptom Checklist - National Menopause Foundation
To hear more about hormones and ADD/ADHD, visit Harmonise You on the web or on Instagram (Adele is a women’s health practitioner in the UK)
A PERSONAL NOTE FROM MANDY
Life isn’t always graceful. Sometimes it’s gritty, heartbreaking, and tangled in shame. And sometimes, it’s all of that and beautiful.
My story isn’t linear. My parents divorced when I was in third grade. My dad wasn’t around. My grandmother—my heart—was the only one who truly saw me. I had a baby in high school, and while everyone loved him, I didn’t feel like anyone loved me. I wasn’t told I was doing a good job. I was just quietly drowning in the weight of responsibility and the absence of comfort.
When the courts decided he’d be better off with his father, I left. I moved to the beach in NC and started over. People there made me feel important. I was promoted quickly, made friends, had money to spare. I traveled. I laughed. I lived.
But I also carried shame like a second skin. Some knew my full story. Others didn’t. I was split between who I was and who I was trying to become.
I came back home and ended up in relationships that mirrored old wounds. Messy, painful ones. I was briefly married. That ended too. I felt like a disappointment again.
And then I lost my grandma, just before COVID. Then my dog, Pocket—my four-legged soulmate. Grief came in waves that never fully settled.
I still don’t know how to talk about my feelings without stumbling. I still have days where I want to disappear or sleep forever. I still feel lonely sometimes—even now, even with so many of the things I always said I wanted. A home. Work that matters. People I love. And yet, I still catch myself feeling like the sad friend—the one who has nothing exciting to share, nothing to brag about, just quietly carrying a lot.
But there are also days when I smell honeysuckle and everything softens. I watch the light flicker through the trees, touch moss on a morning walk, or see a video of a dog discovering a butterfly or a frog, a friend finally getting her dream, and I feel it—this ache of joy that reminds me how much beauty the world still holds.
Yoga, meditation, a warm patch of sun, ripe strawberries, dog cuddles, long walks… they’ve helped me carry on. They remind me that healing doesn’t need to be loud or grand. It can be quiet and steady. It can be a choice made in the stillness of morning: I forgive myself again today.
The other night I sat with friends, and what struck me most is this: no one is alone. Everyone is carrying something. Everyone is trying. Everyone just wants to feel a little more connected. A little more seen. A little more loved.
If that’s you, I see you.
You are not alone.
Carry on, in whatever way you can.
And let the tiniest moments be enough.
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